January 18, 2016
We took this trip to South Dakota because my Grandmother is 97. Even if I make it there more often than usual, our visits are numbered. Her body is thin and, in her words, just tired of working.
The weather was unusually cold even for South Dakota. Everyone just wanted to stay stuck indoors. I visited her with my whole family on the first day. My youngest daughter is named after her. When I called to tell Grandmother that Piper would bear the name Lucile, she gasped and said "Well! She will be the ONLY one ever named after me!!" And she was thrilled. That bit of news shocked me because all of my siblings and cousins love her and hold her as precious as I do. But when I heard that I was SO very glad we had decided to make Lucile be one of Piper's 2 middle names.
Years before I had asked Grandmother to write me a quick story of her life. A while later I received 21 handwritten pages of her life! 21 ... It was and is the most awesome gift I could have ever gotten.
On our last day in SD I left everyone at home and ran up to Agar to see her again. When she saw me she said (one of those phrases that just makes her Grandmother), " Well, HEATHER!! Bless your heart!" It was exactly what my heart wanted to hear. We had a good visit. She showed me her bruises and evidence that her body just can't circulate blood like it used to. We talked about the health of her children, who, because she eloped with the love of her life at 15 or 16, are all experiencing 'old age health issues' themselves.
"Heather, no one should ever have to watch their children get OLD. What could the Lord have left for me to do before I go home? But I get up every day and thank him for the opportunity of each day, pray for all my children and grandkids, and wonder when I will see him face to face."
It was what I wanted and yet it was awful. This battle tested spiritual warrior was sharing her soul. We continued as long as I could stay.
When I got up to say goodbye, she grabbed her walker and stood up to hug me. We hugged like we had 1000 times before, but then she grabbed my wrist with strength that made all of her talk about being so old be questionable and tears filled her eyes. She grabbed my other wrist, and then laid her forehead on mine. "There's a few things I want to tell you young lady, starting with how precious you are to me."
This was it. She was telling me goodbye.
I may never be able to repeat to anyone the things she said. As it is right now I'm sitting beside a total stranger on this flight home crying non-stop just writing this. (Poor guy) He is Twice my size and yet I guarantee He is scared of Me right now LOL.
If I am honored enough to see her again.... Well first of all, she will be ticked she is still here LOL But I don't expect to see her again. Sometimes after a well fought life, people just know when time has very few sands left to fall through the hour glass. But if I didn't have the assurance of heaven this would be torture. However, I do, and so does she.
It's been decades since I've seen her jump and skip and giggle with excitement, but it's fixin to happen again soon. I can feel it. She will bounce from my dad to her husband, and all off the other family who has gone on before her. She will hold the face of her baby girl who was still born, and hug her little brother who drowned at 3 and then she will see Him. Christ, the One most important to her and fall at his feet.
Someday, when I get there she will be so happy to welcome me.
**Update .... ANNND Now she's 101.5 and still such a blessing! I guess on this day she just really knew I might need to hear some of the things she said to me in those "wrist grabbing" moments. Still love her so much. Still my hero, mentor, and spiritual guide .... and she would be whether we were family or not!
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